Chris Christie continues his clueless public fellating of The BOSSSSSSSS while remaining completely unaware that he is the villain of every song by The Boss, closing factories and forbidding his daughter to date the kid from the poor family and calling the Trenton PD to do a sweep of the homeless encampment down under the bridge. QUIT SHOWING UP IN GOOGLE SEARCHES OF “BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN,” JERKOFF.
Last year I did a Manzarek cover recreation that afforded me the opportunity to speak on the degree to which the Los Angeles musical group the Doors is overrated. I made a lot of boys in the Internet sad and mad with my words, because people are stupid and sensitive and don’t like to be faced with the fact that the band whose CD was playing when they first tripped with their older cousin in 8th grade is overrated as HALE and coasted on the fame wrought by its pretty-faced, pretentious lead singer. You’re probably thinking I’m posting this record just so I can revisit that kind of fun and cause some trouble – poke the emotional-music-nerd bear, so to speak. But you’re wrong – I heart Manzarek and his spooky keys, actually, and I’m posting this because 1) I needed an “X” record for my aLPhabet project, and 2) this allows me to finally FINALLY use the caption DAT JOHN, DOE.
(This one also gives me an excuse to daydream about Darby Crash and David Hidalgo meeting in an elevator and talking about being on the same label. Fun!)
When IG vinyl bros (hi guys!) post Larry Young records, they keep it strictly Unity (‘cause it’s pretty and ’cause Woody Shaw) or Lawrence of Newark (‘cause it’s pretty, rare, and has a rad title), with some Larry Young’s Fuel mixed in for the Dilluminati (‘cause it’s got that Slum Village break). Heaven on Earth always gets lost in the shuffle (‘cause it’s not as good as the other albums), but it gives me a chance to break out the white sheet from that time I did the Aquemini cover plus I needed a “Y” record for my aLPhabet project. Y, boys and girls, is for YOUNG.
“Museum directors with their high shaking heads/They kick white shadows until they play dead.” Everybody knows “Let’s Go,” but really, how interesting is it to like the nightlife, baby? It’s not. “The Dangerous Type” is the real and true banger on this album. Shout to Greg Hawkes for the delicious synthy goodness and Roy Thomas Baker for being a general ’70s studio god (QUEEN).
Peace to all the concern trolls who keep turning up on Instagram expressing anxiety about my wardrobe choices. Here’s a nice jeans-and-turtleneck combo to please you, though I should warn that you may still be able to detect I have hips and breasts through the fabric : (
I’m told that this topless gentleman was an important figure in music; more importantly, I know for a fact that he put babies in women on 12 separate occasions, making him the music game Antonio Cromartie. I try not to post album covers that remind me of my home country’s gross insatiable hunger for firearms, but I’ll overlook it in favor of laziness. (I needed an album cover this week and I had the jeans and plastic gun required.)