Category Archives: A lot of MCs like to use the word DRAMATICAL

At the 40/40 club, ESPN on the screen.

NY lovehate.


1. “Jay-Z is my favorite MC.” – Rakim.

He added, “Well, except for ‘Forever Young.’ That song’s bullshit.


Which it is! Fuckin A, Kanye. Stop making bad things happen. Sloppy production work, my dear. Sloppy sloppy. And lazy. Very lazy.

(And yes, the song is awful drivel, but the video of Jay and his lovely wife dueting at Coachella made me teary-eyed. Of course. I mean, Jesus Christ, I’m not some kind of monster).

Hot damn though: being able to buy your mom whatever she wants? Moving units while maintaining the respect of nerdy ladybloggers? And now this, THE GOD Rakim proclaiming his affection for you to the world? Must be nice. Must be real nice. Jay-Z owns the universe and everything in it. He’s our new Oprah.


2. KRS still a crabby old guy, still needs a hobby.

He’s decided to boycott the newly-opened National Museum of Hip Hop located in the Bronx, citing Afrika Bambaataa’s claim that the event is “illegitimate.” [HipHopDX]

I can endorse this.

1. Any translation of hip hop into a museum display is impossible unless Bill Adler is the curator or all the Ego Trip boys do a version of it in my living room.

2. Like KRS, Afrika Bambaataa is my spiritual advisor. I obey him. If he says something is bad and wrong, I steer clear.

3. As the founder of a 1-woman crusade against Drake that has so far been unsuccessful in its attempt to prevent kids from downloading his music, I have sympathy for KRS as he puts out press releases about hip hop history as if people care. Also, KRS can be cranky, is always yelling about how elders must be respected, and he thinks old music is better than new music. KRS and I are twins.


3. I dislike the Yanquis more than you could possibly understand, I mean it’s a real fiery hot passion, but this story warmed my ice-cold heart. Like, the Yankees are Cindy Lou-Who and I’m the Grinch, maybe?

On Thursday, April 15, every MLB player wore #42 in honor of Jackie Robinson, who broke baseball’s color barrier on that date in 1947.

The Yankees were host to the Angels. Second baseman Robinson Cano was named in honor of Robinson. (That’s Rodriguez, Jeter, and Cano above.) He hit 2 home runs during the game, which the Yankees won. And before the game, Cano presented a bouquet of flowers to Rachel Robinson, Jackie’s widow, whose family was honored in ceremonies that day. 44,7-hundred-or-so persons were in attendance. It was 71 degrees outside. New babies were made. I got a puppy. Glenn Beck was in a tragic larynx-damaging accident resulting in his voice being rendered completely silent forever. Etc, etc.

We don’t want no problems, B! Crooklyn Dodgers for musical accompaniment, of course, because what else was I gonna post if not Masta Ace and his nasally voice? I know you wanna enter but I can’t let you in/My mind state’s the maddest; I’m gone with the wind.

.

Bay vs. LA | the NBA | the subway


1. 89% of decisions made by Suge Knight in the last 15 years have been ill-timed and idiotic. That kind of consistency is admirable, and rarely found outside a basketball court featuring THE GOD Kobe Bean Bryant (only it’s his shooting percentage that we’re talking about, so that comparison wasn’t my best). Alas, Suge’s latest stunt was sticking up Oakland rap god Yukmouth, and by “sticking up” I mean “ordering his boys to beat and rob Yukmouth.” Idiotic and ill-timed. OH MARION.

The Luniz, you see, are friends with everyone north of Monterey County, like Mac Dre before his passing had his boys Christopher Columbus, Marco Polo, Solano County, Sac and Yolo. That’s a huge crew. Meanwhile, Suge basically has no friends. Obviously.

The comical nature of this story (the altercation occurred at a Ralph’s! in the Valley!) is only outweighed by my curiosity regarding the fallout from this act. I believe something between “tons of mixtapes n’ diss tracks featuring E-40’s slang-fu” and “the Bay vs LA is the new NY vs LA in rap beef” will happen. Either way, I’m here and I’m ready so let’s do this.

2. GQ’s Most Stylish College Basketball Players of All Time is yet another gimmicky bracket flooding my precious Internet this time of year, but I spend so much time analyzing the style of ’70s/’80s players anyway that it’s been bookmarked in apt. 15. Carmelo and the Headband make an appearance, but it’s Pistol Pete, Bill Walton, and Michigan’s Fab Five and their swaggerrific ’92-ness that make me especially happy. OhanddidImention there is so, SO MUCH Lakers representation? Magic, West, Rambis, Shaq, Worthy, Wilt…and of course, Adam Morrison and Mark Madsen. Obviously.



3. The “What are they listening to on the subway?” Tumblr is an entertaining urban anthropological study that combines some rather lovely and rather horrid music selections (scroll through) with smiling people who seem to have no self-conscious fear of looking goofy for listening to dumb stuff; I enjoy that. I also like how nobody decided to pull the cliche move and say they were listening to Berlin’s “Metro.” And I approve of Rory with the “Poppin Tags” action. I never realized how its BPM is probably perfect for the rhythmic movement and blurred visuals of a subway ride. And I approve of Tony, below. Obviously.

.

Pusha T and Malice been gettin high off they own supply

Something like a phenomenon, baby!

Clipse Call Themselves ‘Best Duo Ever’,
have vision dreams of passion.”
“Gucci Chuck Taylor with the dragon on the side,
Wamp wamp,
Trust, I know them twenty’s real well, and
we’re the best duo EV-ERRR.”

They breed some real comedians out there in Virginia! What I have to say about this is what you would expect me to say about this, so I shall let the musical superheroes in my life do all the talking and express my thoughts and/or feelings about this unfortunate incident:

When reached for comment,

Eric B & Rakim,
Erick & Parrish,
Mos & Kweli,
Kool G & Polo,
Monch & Po,
Prodigy & Havoc,
Bun B & Pimp C,
Guru & Premier,
KRS & Scott, and
Big Boi & Andre

all said the exact same thing, which was, “What the fuck?”
followed by uproarious laughter. A good time was had by all.

Then Malice and Pusha told that one about the guy from Nantucket, and then the one about the priest and the rabbi, and then asked if we knew why the chicken crossed the road.

Annnnd scene.

(PS, they didn’t even say best hip-hop duo…they said best DUO, which takes it to next levels of delusion. Aw, confused and grandiose mic-wielding brothers from Virginia are so adorable! Dear following epic duos, Malice and Pusha would like you to please see yourselves out: Quincy & Michael, Tyson & D’Amato, Magic & Kareem, Marley & Tosh, Slash & Axl, Tiger & a 9-iron, Stevie & a keyboard, me & hips, me & music nerdery, me & general nerdery.)

Jim Jones needs a nap, a bottle, and his blankie


OMG they made a movie about that incredibly talentless Harlem rapper who can’t rap and nobody told me! Thanks a lot, jerks.

What we have here is a story about boys fighting and then each taking their toys and going home and not inviting each other to their big birthday party next week…in-fighting among dudes over the age of 10 is all so ridiculously stupid but the comedy factor just keeps pulling me back in and I cannot turn away. I guess I just didn’t realize that holding Capo status means concerning yourself with a whole lot of bitchery and grown-man-crybabyishness. However, I now see that it’s part of the code. Ballinnnnnnn!

In his new, full-length documentary, This Is Jim Jones (directed by Carly Carol), the 33-year-old Harlemite gives fans a rare glimpse into his life of glaring extremes; an existence punctuated by its star’s perennial underdog status.

Chapter 4 breaks down Dipset’s tenuous relationship with Rocafella’s kingpin, Jay-Z.

In the film’s climactic moment (LOL–Dipset and the word “climactic” shouldn’t ever be in the same vicinity cuz it just don’t make sense), the story (from Jim’s point of view) behind Cam’s megahit “Oh Boy” is told. The “Oh Boy” beat (by Just Blaze) was allegedly intended for Jay-Z, and the “H to the Izzo” beat (by Kanye West) was originally bought by Cam’ron. According to the film, Kanye backtracked and gave his beat to Jay. Cam’ron then took the “Oh Boy” beat and murdered it (with Juelz), so Jay decided to jump on it with a feature. Cam heard Jay’s verse, deemed it wack, and made sure it didn’t see the light of day. According to Dame Dash, Jay then made moves to separate himself from his Harlem label affiliates (in addition to allegedly not letting them put their records out and not signing off on their budgets).

Jim Jones: Fucking Kanye. Sells us a few beats. We watching the BET Awards, Jay-Z is about to perform his new single. He gets up there and it’s the beat that we bought from Kanye. That would be H-To-The-Izzo. So now we’re steaming. Just Blaze had the beats laying around−that was Jay’s beat−Cam says “shut the fuck up, we taking it.” And he blazed the Just Blaze beat. That was ours. Strong armed. Good looking Just Blaze.

– Link


Mixtape design atrocity! Code red!

I look at 8 jillion hip-hop-related sites a day and I’m constantly inundated with these images.
You forgot the glitter & unicorns, gentlemen.

I know these are put out quick, while your hot guest appearance is still relevant, BUT
Crooked I, Jim Jones, Lloyd Banks, et al: there’s a lot of money surrounding you guys so your design aesthetic game needs to be tightened up. Just add a little to the budget and spend 5 extra mins. on the graphics, pleeeease.

Sha, camera’s over here. Also, let’s add the word “Cocaine” on there, because hey, why not.

George Lucas’ lawyer is on line 1 for you, Styles P.

That scale should be tipped waaaay more in favor of the stacks of bills. That’s just physics.

1. You look uncomfortable holding that firearm, Mr. Banks.
2. That dog looks like Spanky, my 12-year-old blind and feeble black lab.

OK, not sure where to begin here. Too much material.
These dudes won’t even be talking to each other next week,
so I hope we can all appreciate the historical significance of this image.
1. Jim Jones, you always look dirty so take a shower please.
2. How you gonna turn the page in your Bible with your hand full of skull like that.
3. Santana looks like he broke the vase when he was playing ball in the house
and he’s making the sadface so Mom will go easy on him.

“Logan, gain 15 lbs and YOU are my next mixtape cover model.
There’s a Louis bag in it for you, mama.”

“Careful, Christopher!” said the zombie, “That crow is trying to eat your luxurious coat!”

Feud/Not A Feud


Feud:
BDP. The Juice Crew.


You love to hear the story, again and again
Of how it all got started way back when.

South Bronx/the South South Bronx.

Th-the-th-bridge.

So you think that hip-hop had its start out in Queensbridge.
If you popped that junk up in the Bronx you might not live.


As odd as it looked, as wild as it seemed/I didn’t hear a peep from a place called Queens.

Bronx keeps creatin it and Queens keeps on fakin it.

Kill that/kill that noise.


Not a feud: Officer Rick. Curtis.


Being the authority on hip-hop-related beef is truly an honor. I’d like to thank the Academy.